mom that cigarette pack you found in my bag??? its a metaphor
mother: is it a boy or a girl?
doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor
*dude puts his mouth around his bros dick* bro, im not actually gay unless i suck it. i never sucked it. its a metaphor, see: you put the dick right between your teeth, but you dont blow it. a metaphor bro
- Kid: Yeah give me a pack of Marlboro Reds.
- Cashier: Are you 18?
- Kid: It's okay, they're a metaphor.
if you don’t like cats consider this:
"i dont know about you, but im feeling 22 officer so i dont think these underage drinking charges should really apply to me"
next time you’re at a party in a town that you hate or dont give a shit about or something see how many dudes you can sneak off with and like go to take off their pants but then just pull their belt out of their pants and leave. see how many belts you can collect & compete with your friends. this is a sport called final fantasying